Take Control

By Sarah Bowen Shea

Quick techniques to deal with envy and other temptations

No matter how hard you try, you’re never going to rid your life of all the things that annoy you. But yoga can help you handle those anxiety-ridden scenarios. “There’s no question: Yoga practiced appropriately will have an impact on relaxing the mind,” says Lorenzo Cohen, Ph.D., associate professor in the department of behavioral science and director of the integrative medicine program at The University of Texas M.D. Anderson Cancer Center in Houston. “With enough practice of breathing and meditation, one can call on that peaceful state at any given time.”

Here are two everyday stressful situations, plus the techniques to keep yourself calm and centered in all of them.

Your best friend just got engaged—and you can't stand it!

Do you seethe with envy instead of bubbling with enthusiasm when a gal-pal flaunts her new 3-carat rock? Time to practice one of the eight “limbs” of yoga called santosha—yogi-speak for contentment, says Desiree Rumbaugh, co-owner of Arizona Yoga in Scottsdale. “This means calling forth the feeling of ‘I am happy with what I’m attracting in my life, and I am also happy for what others are attracting in theirs.’” Being jealous or envious doesn’t increase anyone’s santosha, and, she says, “Yoga helps you not get consumed by a feeling.”

If reminding yourself of all the good that is in your life doesn’t clobber the green-eyed monster, Rumbaugh suggests going off by yourself and writing down your feelings about your friend’s news. Look at the feelings—envy, delight, resentment, you name it—and feel them. Then choose the response that feels right to you. “Yogis are continually making choices. It’s empowering,” she says. You might have to repeat this list-writing exercise several times to land in a happy place for your friend. And yourself.

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